Last night while I was organizing and cleaning my room out, I stumbled across a ton of books, all of them I started reading, almost finished, then put down and started another one. All 10 of them have bookmarks in them, near the end, but for some reason I never finished them. I don't really know why I have the need to start something else before I finish the thing I was on first.
My goal, until it is finished, is to finish everything I have started before starting something else. So, i have 10 books to finish reading, quite a few sewing projects that need to be finished, some scrap booking, writing down of recipes onto cards, and even a cross stitching project I've been working on for a year or so. Maybe through all of this I will figure out why I think it is necessary to start so many projects and finish so few.
On another note, everyday it seems that more and more people are calling me with their problems, at first I was like "oh my how am I going to deal with this, I can't even deal with my own problems". Yesterday while I was thinking about a specific person and wondering why in the world God put me in this position, I realized that out of all of this I have learned how to pray really well. I now pray about everything and anything, Thanking God for all he has given me and not really sitting in my own hole and dwelling on my problems. I feel it has brought me closer to God, because I don't really feel awkward talking to him anymore. It is, also, kind of nice to not really have the time to sit and sulk. A part of me, though, is fearful that when things slow down and not so many people need me, I will have to come to terms with what I, myself, need to deal with. I guess I might even feel a little sad because I won't feel needed anymore...(at least for the time being) I get satisfaction out of helping people, I think it makes me feel worth something, like someone actually needs me to be here on this earth to make them feel better. I know that that is not the only reason why I am here, and like many other people I am trying to find my place in this giant messed up world.
Until next time...
Smoked Pepper Salsa
11 years ago
4 comments:
Wow...I wish I could do that. I finish books, usually, but the projects...oh my!
Well, let's see, I finish my records because I have to. I finish making the bed when I do that. I finish emptying the dishwasher. I finish the icecream when we have it in the fridge. I finish drying my hair because I don't like to be cold. I finish putting on my shoes. I wish I could finish a fun project. And I have lots of those!!!!
haha I always finish the ice cream too :)
Some people get bored easily and need a lot of variety in their lives. That's my situation; I'm changing and moving from one thing to another all the time... It's nice when you have moms or sisters around that you can go to when you need advice or encouragement on a project if you get stuck in the middle. I have a hard time when I am a perfectionist because I give up when I don't think it's good enough...and I know practice makes perfect, but for some strange reason I think I have to do it great the first time!
Isn't God great for teaching us to serve others and by doing so we are blessed and feel needed. It's so true that when we focus on and reach out to others we have less time to be self-absorbed; just make sure you don't totally ignore your own needs! ;p Auntie
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